Happy Birthday to Me

Been awhile since I have written here or anywhere.

Sis is on my ass to write so here I am.

What's new?

Kid moved out.She stopped coming to pay per views at the house.She didn't come to my Birthday PPV....She opted out when invited to the tattoo shop today when I went to get a touch up.Yeah....I'm pretty damned depressed.Chris however has done everyting in his power to make me happy and I am when I am with him. I'm hella happy then.But when I'm alone.......On to other things...


Halloween Safety Tips
No Scaredy Cats This Halloween:
Top 10 Safety Tips for Pet Parents

Attention, companion animal caretakers! The ASPCA would like to point out these common-sense cautions that’ll help keep your pets safe and stress-free this time of year. If you do suspect your pet has ingested a potentially dangerous substance, please call your veterinarian or the ASPCA Animal Poison Control Center at (888) 426-4435.

1. No tricks, no treats: That bowlful of candy is for trick-or-treaters, not for Scruffy and Fluffy.
Chocolate in all forms—especially dark or baking chocolate—can be very dangerous for dogs and cats. Symptoms of significant chocolate ingestion may include vomiting, diarrhea, hyperactivity, increased thirst, urination and heart rate—and even seizures.
Candies containing the artificial sweetener xylitol can be poisonous to dogs. Even small amounts of xylitol sweetener can cause a sudden drop in blood sugar, which leads to depression, lack of coordination and seizures. In cases of significantly low blood sugar, liver failure has been known to occur.
Ingesting tin foil and cellophane candy wrappers can pose a choking hazard or cause intestinal blockage.

2. Popular Halloween plants such as pumpkins and decorative corn are considered to be relatively nontoxic, yet they can produce gastrointestinal upset should pets ingest them. Intestinal blockage could even occur if large pieces are swallowed.

3. Keep wires and cords from electric lights and other decorations out of reach of your pets. If chewed, your pet could experience damage to his mouth from shards of glass or plastic, or receive a possibly life-threatening electrical shock.

4. A carved pumpkin certainly is festive, but do exercise extreme caution if you choose to add a candle. Pets can easily knock a lit pumpkin over and cause a fire. Curious kittens especially run the risk of getting burned or singed by candle flames.

5. Dress-up can be a big mess-up for some pets. Please don't put your dog or cat in a costume UNLESS you know he or she loves it (yup, a few pets are real hams!). For pets who prefer their “birthday suits,” however, wearing a costume can cause undue stress.

6. If you do dress up your pet, make sure the costume isn't annoying or unsafe. It should not constrict the animal's movement or hearing, or impede his ability to breathe, bark or meow. Also try on costumes before the big night. If your pet seems distressed, allergic or shows abnormal behavior, consider letting him go au naturel or donning a festive bandana.

7. Take a closer look at your pet’s costume and make sure it does not have small, dangling or easily chewed-off pieces that he could choke on. Also, ill-fitting outfits can get twisted on external objects or your pet, leading to injury.

8. All but the most social dogs and cats should be kept in a separate room away from the front door during peak trick-or-treat visiting hours. Too many strangers can be scary and stressful for pets.

9. When opening the door for trick-or-treaters, take care that your cat or dog doesn't dart outside.

10. IDs, please! Always make sure your dog or cat has proper identification. If for any reason your pet escapes and become lost, a collar and tags and/or a microchip can increase the chances that he or she will be returned to you

Been a long time...

Wow, so much has been going on. I don't know where to begin....
My Kid went to see family members she hasn't seen in like 10 years and things didn't work out for the best. I ended up on the phone all night every night then I had my normal routines in the day.
It took awhile to bounce back from that plus I have been doing all the house work I can. I'm slow at it but I get it done...except for the laundry and the animal cages.
I went to the Two Left Paws fun run for charity. I was "Water girl" I'm happy to say I will be doing Administration work for the charity. I do one mobile a week as well. (That is where I go out and socialize the animals at the local Kmart, and try to get them adopted.)
Don't know if I mentioned Pierce has come and gone and my Uncle and friend Sharon is coming in about 15 days with their chow~chow (named Furby) and they are staying for a couple days. I haven't seen them for about 10 years. I am kind of worried cause they have never seen me since I got sick so they are in for some surprises.
Chris took me to see Dark Knight twice. It was so awesome. Lucky and I went to see Mamma Mia and yes we cried. We also went and got tattoos together. Sarah went with and got one too. I designed mine...pics will follow (as soon as Chris puts them on the comp) He's pretty happy with the laptop. A friend of his is back online and that has him in good spirits.
Lucky bought Ben a Lhasa Apso puppy.(for his Birthday) They are so cute. We used to have one named Candy. He named his Squeakers.....WOW.....it's a long shot from the Bulldog he wanted. I can't wait to tease him. (Snickers)
Sis has packed up and moved to Fla in time for Hurricane Faye and school to start. From what I hear the hurricane was a breeze and so is school.
Due to scheduling I won't be able to see my Shrink til Sept 19 I believe. I don't like going this long without seeing him. I've already felt down for the last few days...
Most my time is spent on housework, keeping up with my things online (except for rping) and spending the evenings watching shows with Chris then horror flicks with Pierce via phone.
I still feel an emptiness there.
Mickey is still missing. I really think he isn't coming back and I hate to admit it.
There are issues I have with some people I don't think will ever be brought to light....so much closure left undone.
Sometimes I feel I am loosing to my inner battles. I mean I have so much I do, things to really be proud of...and I am in the moment I am doing it, or talking about it ....all my animal work is really going places. I have this brag book of letters sent from congressmen and the white house and so on that I have been meaning to get together...I just never do. I have all the things I need for it too.
I have stacks and stacks of books I know I would get into and I adore reading yet I don't.
I tell myself I am doing OK because I still go out there into the outside. Even if it is for selfish reasons. I will leave the house for Two Left Paws, or to see a movie I want to see, or to get the tattoos covered I have been wanting to get done. (Only took me 15 years) but is it really good when I still take my anti anxiety meds before I go?
I work on going without them here at home and i do good with it. Sometimes I get all squirrely but I go without until I can't sleep or something...
I have been sleeping...only thing keeping me up is Pogo games, Pierce, and horror flicks...(since Lucky got home).
I feel better just writing this. It has been a long time....
I used to write all the time....
I need to get back to my guild but ...
There always is a but.
All talked out.

Well it started positive...

Nancy Grace is amazing. She tells it how it is yet allows both sides of the story to be told.
Glenn Beck is a pistol and he's not afraid to pop off and speak his mind. Gotta respect that.
Flo, the Progressive sales gal is hot and something tells me she's a bit of a freak. Yummy.
God Bless Caylee Anthony. She's the lil two year old whose been missing for six weeks. Her Mother Casey has been lying to everyone, she's in jail and I pray she rots in prison. All her calls made from the police station were full of cursing and smart ass remarks until she found out they were being taped. When she found out that she was being taped she started acting all sweet. What a snake. When she said she was out looking for her daughter she was really out partying and pics where found of her tramping it out at a bar on Hot Bod night. The grandmother, Cindy is horrid as well. She washed pants that "Smelled like death" and Casey had worn the last day that Caylee was seen alive.
I just hope she is found alive and the only one who knows if she is alive or dead is...her mother.
I can't stand the extent people will go to with lies, games and so on just to hurt other's.
Ugh! I am just sick with most people in general.
Still networking online to get Mickey's info out. I'm praying about this and I've given the information to everyone I can and more.
To worn out to write anymore.

Please Look and Pass On...LOST DOG

http://sheboygan.craigslist.org/laf/783654032.html

MICKEY IS LOST, LONELY, AND SCARED!!!

http://sheboygan.craigslist.org/laf/783654032.html

Craigslist only let me put it in once, it's good for 35 or 45 days, please pass it along. This was a tourest spot he went missing in, if he was picked up by a family he could be anywhere! Pictures are on the sight.

Thank you!
Angel

http://www.myspace.com/mickey_is_lost

PLEASE LOOK AT THESE PICTURES... CONTACT ME OR MY SISTER ON HER BLOG www.ryandawnkenziemaddiecox.blogspot.com IF YOU HAVE SEEN THIS DOG OR IF YOU MIGHT KNOW WHERE HE IS. HE HAS A CHIP AND A VET CAN SCAN IT TO SEE WHERE HE RIGHTFULLY BELONGS! HIS IS SCARED WE ARE SURE. PLEASE HELP FOR THE SAKE OF THE PUP!

THANKS,
ANGEL AND MICKEY'S SEARCH CREW!

MICKEY IS MISSING

Grr, I am so upset....frusterated and I want to be Super Angel and swoop in to save Mickey. Mickey has been missing for a few days now. I can't do anything except what I've done already.
I made flyers.
Lucky went down with two of her friends with some of Mickey's favorite toys. Hopefully if he hears the squeking he might come.
He's like 2or three hours away from home...without his tags on.
He's never been alone out there...in the woods.
I've contacted everyone I can via phone and Internet.
It's been storming here, lots of lightning and thunder ....I pray he is warm and safe....he hates storms.
My tummy hurts and I'm all nerved up but not enough to make Chris crazy he said.
He is doing all he can for me and I stayed close to him all day.
Pierce took the night shift....thanks! (Like he will ever read this)
Killing the time with texas Hold'em....
Please pray for the pup.

Why I have been silent...besides my health

It's been a long time since I've written anything down in my online journals, a really long time. I've been trying to keep pretty busy in the reality real world and I've been pretty darn successful with it.
I've had my best bud fly in and stay a week with us. We had so much fun!Got tons of pics, showed him some sights, wined and dined him...minus the wine! I might post some pictures...if I find time.
I've started rping for two to three hours in the afternoons when Chris gets off work now. I feel good about doing it that way and less stressed then I used to be. I only play games on the comp at night now. That helps relax me to where when I used to rp I was anxious about this or that. There would always be some flare up I had to deal with and I didn't have fun. Doing it this way has brought the fun back.
I'm doing a lot more work in my animal projects. I worked the food ticket table at the Lobster Brat Fry and will be doing something at our upcoming Moon Walk Marathon. I also do mobiles when I can. That is where I go to a store where we (TWO LEFT PAWS) have a bunch of cats/dogs on view for adoption. I generally socialize them and talk to passers by. Chris and Pierce went to the Brat Fry and Chris will be helping with the Moon Walk...or dropping me off or something. He's also working out getting me to the mobiles. I'm happy to have that structured out. I get so much out of it and I also have all my charities, petitions and work I do in other Animal Rights areas.
I'm still seeing my shrink and he does me well. I use a lot that he tells me, mixed in what Chris and Pierce suggest and I can't tell a lie....my newest thing is to "Be the BATMAN." He has such self control. It helps with the panic attacks when I remember. Most of the time I have a lot of pain in my chest due to my tetzey's syndrome so it hurts tooo bad to breathe deep so it's a struggle.
I have found some new happiness. Seeing Pierce really helped with my abandonment issues feared he was going to be like everyone else, besides Chris. (I don't include my daughter or Sis in this) I really thought I had my place in the world and that I would be content in my animals, hobbies, and recovery....I was wrong.
I tried my best to push past this whole thing with my daughter, her money, and the whole spending of it. I mean seriously. I am so angry. I found this out yesterday when it took over and almost ruined my date with Chris. I haven't been angry like that in a long...long time. I was fuming, cursing to myself, storming around the house. I snapped at Chris and it took half the trip to Sheboygan and some Bowling for Soup to relax me...and a Xanex which I have been going days without.
Here's the story...
The kid was in a car accident with me years ago. (A friend was driving, we were hit by a drunk) and she got a nice settlement. I'm talking college, a car....and all was well. I was worried a bit that her friends might take advantage of her kindness but found that to be false. You can imagine my shock when it turned out to be someone I spent most of my time with that shifted and became her running buddy.
At first it was just trips to the store, shopping, the kid spending her new money and all that is normal. Spending money on a friend I can deal with, gas money, a lunch or two. A gift for helping out..ok BUT....when it got into the hundreds...then thousands....I lost it.
I kept my mouth shut save for discussing it with my shrink, and the few people closest to me because they too had concerns over this. I attempted to talk to my daughter who spoke to me privately about this as well. I tried my best to put it behind me.
Even when I was left sitting at home over and over having my descisions made for me like I was a invalid. All of a sudden, I who have gone to Appleton and on several other trips was squeezed out and told that "It was a long trip, didn't think you'd wanna be in the car that long...blah blah blah"
Seriously.....I mean really?....Seriously???
At first I battled with myself thinking it was jeliousy. I found out that wasn't it when something my daughter and I planned for years was done without me.
Not to mention that my friend dropped me like a rock.
I realized I was feeling pain at a deeper level. The pain grew to anger when I'd hear things that struck me wrong at a moral level. I felt sorrow for my daughter because she was in tears twice because she confessed she wasn't trying to steal my friend. I told her I wasn't upset with her at all because my friend made choices. I was however concerned about the cash she was throwing about.
It got to the point that I'd just not want to hear about what they were doing. It was so hard cause I had to be happy and interested for my kid and look at what she had bought and I do like to see her purchases. It's fun to see the joy on her face....
However, I can't get past the fact that my daughter is footing the bills for hotel rooms at 200 bucks a pop. That she bought tickets...then season passes for everyone that went. I can't handle that she is paying for all the food, handing out 100's of dollars for spending cash, and will be paying for more hotel fee's next week.
For her to have a good time she has to foot the bill for everyone else....her boyfriend excluded is a fucking shame.
Seriously....gifts, manicures, clothes, furniture, pedicures, wekend getaways, season passes, cash, gas money.....gods only knows what else. Have you no shame? When is enough ...enough? My kid has a kind heart and she is being taken advantage of....period.
Several times I have been ready to say something but I decided against it. I held it all in even when my shrink and Chris said to write in my blog for fear of the aftermath for my kid if anyone reads this. But then again, it is my blog and if someone gets hurt reading it then they chose to read it, or so I'm told. I have no chice now because it is affecting me now and my relationships and my fun time.
It all boiled to a head yesterday. But it started the night before.
She came home and they had gone to see Mamma Mia....a movie I was going to ask Chris to take me and Lucky to becaue it was such a "US" movie. I thought we could watch it when Chris and his brother were watching something else in another theater....
Another day I was left at home alone, another day they decided I wouldn't want to come.
I wrestled with that, I hadn't yet got to talk to chris about it. Nothing was set in stone. So goes life.
Then she was showing me her purchases, all was well....until she started acting funny. There was weirdness over the reciept thus letting me know she had yet again spent money on "Her" and more then just the pair of panties she said.
Then she was crying...talking about the not meaning to take my friend thing again.
I assured her I was over it. I know where I lay in the sceme of things where said friend is concerned. I've learned to deal with it...after the grimace on my face over the pics they took at the mall.
What my kid doesn't understand is the grimace was the Cha-ching sound I heard in my head and not the "I'm being replaced grimace"
I've had to due with cutting back on my activities and including Chris in my TWO LEFT PAWS events. We've worked out one Saturday a month that he will take me to the Plymouth mobile. (Saturday is usually Movie day with his brother, but will switch it for a Sunday for me) And the spa is totally cut out due to all he has on his plate. He does however get me out to a movie every week he can so I don't go stir crazy in this house.
And as for my girlfriend things...well, I have Pierce as my girlfriend and he fits the job well...even all the way from PA.
So....until I can look at my past running mate without hearing the cash register sound, we have a problem.
As much as I love my kid, she is too nice for her own good cause she feels guilty or bad if she doesn't dote on whose she's with. She can't handle guilt trips and I can't stress the point enough that.... that is her money....for her future...and yes, she has the right to spend it how she see's fit and handle the consiquinces there of....BUT...
Enough is enough.
She won't stop giving if your hands out.
She could have put a down payment on a house, or bought a car with what she's blown with you.
Enough said.
*Noted, this is being placed on a blog my daughter has no access to so she isn't left feeling guilty over what I've been feeling.*