Enuff Already

I'm going out of my skull, my hands are breaking out in patches again as well as the tops of my feet, on my left knee and elbow and my breathing is hard to get control of again. My Doc can't keep me on steroids forever and It's the only thing so far that keeps my skin under control and my lungs fluid free. I have these two surgeries next week as well as a Doc apt before the meeting for some ungodly reason. Why I'd see him before the procedures is beyond me.
My nerves are shot over what is going on with my Kid, my friends and I'm not sleeping all that well.
I can't fins an escape over the net due to it going offline every time the wind changes and my mind is racing too much to read.
I have the shrink today but what do i tell him? Nothing has changed in my head...things are shit?
I try to do what he asks me to, try hell, i have done what he asks me to but i still feel like I'm drowning and i fight with my best friends.
My kid, no matter how often we work things out in her life she treads quicksand and I get the brunt of it.
I feel like shit. I'm angry. I'm sick of getting better, getting my hopes up then it all back firing.
I want to crawl in a ball with Mister Teddy and Bu Bunny and just *Poof*

Date Nite

Wow, I had the best date nite Ever! Chris and I went out to eat at taco Bell then went to see Horton Hears A Who. He was quite the gentleman opening doors and closing them, holding my hand, tender romantic kisses here and there. I think what touched my heart the most is the song he burned on a CD, dedicated to and sung to me as well. He does sing often and I love it. It made me remember a night when he laid in bed, held me and sung to me. It just felt really good to get away from the house, alone and not be rushed. My health was well enough where there was no major problem. I got winded a bit and tired as well. I did run into a couple of bushes and stagger off the sidewalk. Classic Angel! I do have to say i wasn't panicky, I didn't feel odd around people and I was friendly to a soldier and an old man. I normally don't speak to people. The whole day went well and I will carry it on until the evening and if i cut you off I am sorry if it hurt your feelings but I did deserve having one day where I let no negativity in. (You know who I am talking about if your reading this)

The Song I spoke about...I am sure you will know what part applies to Chris and I.
SALIVA LYRICS
"Here With You"
Well I heard your voice on a Tulsa wind
When I was far away from home
I will come to you in a dream my friend
To love you when I'm gone
And there's never a second
Never a moment that you'll ever be alone
From Memphis to Oklahoma
From Boston to California
From Detroit to Arizona
I will always be forever,
Here with you
Well the first time I ever seen you face
I saw the ghost behind your eyes
Ever consuming me with your warm embrace
You're a woman and a child
And in just one second
Just one moment
It finally feels like home
In life there will be trials and troubles
But we will always have each other
And there will never be another woman in this world

Haji is HOTT

Here I sit on shrink day but he has the day off and though I have his number, I think I can make it through. LOL
I've been getting some hobbies and house work done so I'm pretty happy with myself although I've had some rough patches.
I got all read up on my QC. (Great Read)
http://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1
I also got Pierce's gift mailed out finally, Liz's is all taken care of and I still have a little to do on my Sister's.
I'm all done with my steroids and I know that has everyone around me happy as a lark. To say I was on edge is a understatement. I hardly slept and no matter what, the smallest movement or excitement sent me on a hyper buzz kick. I was loud, snappy and well...scary.
(Sorry Peeps, you know I love you)
I finally got my Tekturna back so my heart will stop racing. The Doctor had to up the dosage and the insurance company took forever to clear it even though they had just done so a month earlier...for the lower dosage.
Anyway...
I have two surgeries on April 25th and Chris is putting in for the day off. Liz offered to be there too. I am blessed.
April Fools came and went with no folly. I think people were scared to pull something on me...lol Afraid I might hulk out!
I wish I could say everything is wonderful in my Daughter's life. She has got a lot on her plate and her own lessons to learn and all I can do is listen...so I do. I have faith if she really needs me she will know I am here to help. (Love you PussyKat)
Tell me why does Billy Mayes yell in all his commercials? I mean seriously!
Taxes should get here soon so I get a new bed! YAY! (Poor Chris, I will try not to push you out)
Liz and I have been playing Mario Party with Liz. Noon meds put me out for the last two days but damn it! I win! I can win....asleep! Damn I ROCK!
What does suck is I get confused with the controls on the mini games since there are so many and I'm medicated, *Pouts* Liz pokes fun at me.
Sis hung up on me just now cause i spaced out. NOT NICE.
OK, I am rambling...
Wrestlemania XXIV was awesome and WE LOVE YOU RIC FLAIR. He started his career the year I was born.
GOOD JOB ON YOUR ASSIGNMENTS SIS!
WEBKINZ ROCK!
GAIA RULZ
CAIO