Enuff Already

I'm going out of my skull, my hands are breaking out in patches again as well as the tops of my feet, on my left knee and elbow and my breathing is hard to get control of again. My Doc can't keep me on steroids forever and It's the only thing so far that keeps my skin under control and my lungs fluid free. I have these two surgeries next week as well as a Doc apt before the meeting for some ungodly reason. Why I'd see him before the procedures is beyond me.
My nerves are shot over what is going on with my Kid, my friends and I'm not sleeping all that well.
I can't fins an escape over the net due to it going offline every time the wind changes and my mind is racing too much to read.
I have the shrink today but what do i tell him? Nothing has changed in my head...things are shit?
I try to do what he asks me to, try hell, i have done what he asks me to but i still feel like I'm drowning and i fight with my best friends.
My kid, no matter how often we work things out in her life she treads quicksand and I get the brunt of it.
I feel like shit. I'm angry. I'm sick of getting better, getting my hopes up then it all back firing.
I want to crawl in a ball with Mister Teddy and Bu Bunny and just *Poof*