| The Keys to Your Heart |
 You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored. You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy. You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please. Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets. Your risk of cheating is low. Even if you're tempted, you'd try hard not to do it. You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred. In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily. |
Mistress Crow Darkstride
My Dark Queen
The Critter Crusader Strikes Agian
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Fits me to a T
Wow, Just what I needed at the right Moment today.
This song came at a time today when I needed it most. Today...
Artist: Lawrence Tracy
Song: Find Out Who Your Friends Are
Album: For the Love
Run your car off the side of the road
Get stuck in a ditch way out in the middle of nowhere
Or get yourself in a bind lose the shirt off your back
Need a floor, need a couch, need a bus fare
This is where the rubber meets the road
This is where the cream is gonna rise
This is what you really didn't know
This is where the truth don't lie
{Chorus}
You find out who your friends are
Somebody's gonna drop everything
Run out and crank up their car
Hit the gas, get there fast
Never stop to think 'what's in it for me?' or 'it's way too far'
They just show on up with their big old heart
You find out who your friends are
Everybody wants to slap your back
wants to shake your hand
when you're up on top of that mountain
But let one of those rocks give way then you slide back down look up
and see who's around then
This ain't where the road comes to an end
This ain't where the bandwagon stops
This is just one of those times when
A lot of folks jump off
{Chorus}
When the water's high
When the weather's not so fair
When the well runs dry
Who's gonna be there?
{Chorus}
You find out who your friends are
(yeah, yeah)
You find out who your friends are
Run your car off the side of the road
Get stuck in a ditch way out in the middle of nowhere
(Well man, I've been there)
Or get yourself in a bind lose the shirt off your back
Need a floor, need a couch, need a bus fare
(Man, I've been there)
Man, I've been there
Oooh yeah.
((THANK YOU SIS AND SHRIMP))
Artist: Lawrence Tracy
Song: Find Out Who Your Friends Are
Album: For the Love
Run your car off the side of the road
Get stuck in a ditch way out in the middle of nowhere
Or get yourself in a bind lose the shirt off your back
Need a floor, need a couch, need a bus fare
This is where the rubber meets the road
This is where the cream is gonna rise
This is what you really didn't know
This is where the truth don't lie
{Chorus}
You find out who your friends are
Somebody's gonna drop everything
Run out and crank up their car
Hit the gas, get there fast
Never stop to think 'what's in it for me?' or 'it's way too far'
They just show on up with their big old heart
You find out who your friends are
Everybody wants to slap your back
wants to shake your hand
when you're up on top of that mountain
But let one of those rocks give way then you slide back down look up
and see who's around then
This ain't where the road comes to an end
This ain't where the bandwagon stops
This is just one of those times when
A lot of folks jump off
{Chorus}
When the water's high
When the weather's not so fair
When the well runs dry
Who's gonna be there?
{Chorus}
You find out who your friends are
(yeah, yeah)
You find out who your friends are
Run your car off the side of the road
Get stuck in a ditch way out in the middle of nowhere
(Well man, I've been there)
Or get yourself in a bind lose the shirt off your back
Need a floor, need a couch, need a bus fare
(Man, I've been there)
Man, I've been there
Oooh yeah.
((THANK YOU SIS AND SHRIMP))
Latte?
| What Your Latte Says About You |
 You are interested in only pure and simple pleasures. You don't like to pollute your body or mind. You are a very frivolous person. You don't take anything too seriously. Why should you? You have a good deal of energy, but you pace yourself. You never burn out too fast. You're addicted to caffeine. There's no denying it. You are a child at heart, and you don't ever miss the opportunity to do something playful. You are honest and genuine, but you are never tactless. |
What kind of Blogger am I?
| You Are a Life Blogger! |
 Your blog is the story of your life - a living diary. If it happens, you blog it. And make it as entertaining as possible. |
Breathe...
Are you lonely? That was what my shrink asked me. I've thought about those three words over and over since he uttered them Thursday afternoon. I told him I have Chris and Lucky in the evening when we eat dinner and watch our shows. He repeated the question tacking on "in the day when they are gone?" I said I have my Sister who calls on the phone and there is Pierce who calls in the evenings...."But are you lonely?"
I know something is missing in my life.
I used to be the go to girl. There were so many people calling on and leaning on me that I hardly had time to think of anything inside me. But in those times, there were also people that were there if I needed something. If I needed to talk...I had that.
But now... when I really need you...I find myself lacking that.
Funny how people show up when they need a ride or a baby sitter. I get the call when your special friends aren't home. I get the visit when there is nothing better to do. I'm the one you call cause you have boyfriend/girlfriend troubles. I'm the one you contact when you want pity. The one you dump on when no one else is there or the one you reach out to when your bored.
I'm the in between girl now.
I have issues with abandonment.
I found myself deconstructing and the sleep was fading away once again so I started seeing a Shrink weekly. I'm finding that a good place to let go of the darkness inside me. I had hoped I had found a friend to rely on but sadly it hasn't happened so the Shrink will have to suffice.
It might be his job to listen but I know he is going to be there every time he is supposed to be, he's not going to lie to me, weasel out of a session or quit me when something new and shiny comes along. He won't give me excuses....and he will listen....really listen when I talk and anything he tells me will be for my greater good.
I know something is missing in my life.
I used to be the go to girl. There were so many people calling on and leaning on me that I hardly had time to think of anything inside me. But in those times, there were also people that were there if I needed something. If I needed to talk...I had that.
But now... when I really need you...I find myself lacking that.
Funny how people show up when they need a ride or a baby sitter. I get the call when your special friends aren't home. I get the visit when there is nothing better to do. I'm the one you call cause you have boyfriend/girlfriend troubles. I'm the one you contact when you want pity. The one you dump on when no one else is there or the one you reach out to when your bored.
I'm the in between girl now.
I have issues with abandonment.
I found myself deconstructing and the sleep was fading away once again so I started seeing a Shrink weekly. I'm finding that a good place to let go of the darkness inside me. I had hoped I had found a friend to rely on but sadly it hasn't happened so the Shrink will have to suffice.
It might be his job to listen but I know he is going to be there every time he is supposed to be, he's not going to lie to me, weasel out of a session or quit me when something new and shiny comes along. He won't give me excuses....and he will listen....really listen when I talk and anything he tells me will be for my greater good.
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
RIP Heath...
So many people think they are an authority in the life of other's.
Everyone is a critic.
People die, like Heath Ledger....for example, and everyone has to have their piece of the action. You get caught up in a whirlwind of speculations.
What sickens me is how the same one's who sing your praises are the wolves at your feet when your found out that your imperfect...like Chris Beniot.
This isn't just true for the famous beautiful people.
It's for us too...
And guess what....
I'm not perfect.
Friday, January 18, 2008
For The Momma's and the Pappa's
PARENT - Job Description
This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way,
I don't believe any of us would have done it!!!!
POSITION :
Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop
JOB DESCRIPTION :
Long term, team players needed, for challenging
permanent work in an,
often chaotic environment.
Candidates must possess excellent communication
and organizational skills and be willing to work
variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends
and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.
Some overnight travel required, including trips to
primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities!
Travel expenses not reimbursed.
Extensive courier duties also required.
RESPONSIBILITIES :
The rest of your life.
Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily,
until someone needs $5.
Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.
Also, must possess the physical stamina of a
pack mule
and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat
in case, this time, the screams from
the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges,
such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets
and stuck zippers.
Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and
coordinate production of multiple homework projects.
Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings
for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
Must be willing to be indispensable one minute,
an embarrassment the next.
Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a
half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.
Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
Must assume final, complete accountability for
the quality of the end product.
Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and
janitorial work throughout the facility.
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION :
None.
Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills,
so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you
PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE :
None required unfortunately.
On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.
WAGES AND COMPENSATION :
Get this! You pay them!
Offering frequent raises and bonuses.
When you die, you give them whatever is left.
The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that
you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.
BENEFITS :
While no health or dental insurance, no pension,
no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and
no stock options are offered;
this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth
and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.
Forward this to all the PARENTS you know, in appreciation for everything they do on a daily basis,
letting them know they are appreciated
for the fabulous job they do...
or forward with Special Love
to anyone thinking of applying for the job.
This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way,
I don't believe any of us would have done it!!!!
POSITION :
Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma
Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa, Pop
JOB DESCRIPTION :
Long term, team players needed, for challenging
permanent work in an,
often chaotic environment.
Candidates must possess excellent communication
and organizational skills and be willing to work
variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends
and frequent 24 hour shifts on call.
Some overnight travel required, including trips to
primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities!
Travel expenses not reimbursed.
Extensive courier duties also required.
RESPONSIBILITIES :
The rest of your life.
Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily,
until someone needs $5.
Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.
Also, must possess the physical stamina of a
pack mule
and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat
in case, this time, the screams from
the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges,
such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets
and stuck zippers.
Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and
coordinate production of multiple homework projects.
Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings
for clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
Must be willing to be indispensable one minute,
an embarrassment the next.
Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a
half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.
Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
Must assume final, complete accountability for
the quality of the end product.
Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and
janitorial work throughout the facility.
POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION :
None.
Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills,
so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you
PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE :
None required unfortunately.
On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.
WAGES AND COMPENSATION :
Get this! You pay them!
Offering frequent raises and bonuses.
When you die, you give them whatever is left.
The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that
you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.
BENEFITS :
While no health or dental insurance, no pension,
no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and
no stock options are offered;
this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth
and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.
Forward this to all the PARENTS you know, in appreciation for everything they do on a daily basis,
letting them know they are appreciated
for the fabulous job they do...
or forward with Special Love
to anyone thinking of applying for the job.
You stay up for 16 hours
He stays up for days on end.
You take a warm shower to help you wake up.
He goes days or weeks without running water.
You complain of a 'headache', and call in sick.
He gets shot at as others are hit, and keeps moving forward.
You put on your anti war/don't support the troops shirt, and go meet
up with your friends.
He still fights for your right to wear that shirt.
You make sure you're cell phone is in your pocket.
He clutches the cross hanging on his chain next to his dog tags.
You talk trash about your 'buddies' that aren't with you.
He knows he may not see some of his buddies again.
You walk down the beach, staring at all the pretty girls.
He patrols the streets, searching for insurgents and terrorists.
You complain about how hot it is.
He wears his heavy gear, not daring to take off his helmet to wipe
his brow.
You go out to lunch, and complain because the restaurant got your
order wrong.
He doesn't get to eat today.
Your maid makes your bed and washes your clothes.
He wears the same things for weeks, but makes sure his weapons are
clean.
You go to the mall and get your hair redone.
He doesn't have time to brush his teeth today.
You're angry because your class ran 5 minutes over.
He's told he will be held over an extra 2 months.
You call your girlfriend and set a date for tonight.
He waits for the mail to see if there is a letter from home.
You hug and kiss your girlfriend, like you do everyday.
He holds his letter close and smells his love's perfume.
You roll your eyes as a baby cries.
He gets a letter with pictures of his new child, and wonders if
they'll ever meet.
You criticize your government, and say that war never solves
anything.
He sees the innocent tortured and killed by their own people and
remembers why he is fighting.
You hear the jokes about the war, and make fun of men like him.
He hears the gunfire, bombs and screams of the wounded.
You see only what the media wants you to see.
He sees the broken bodies lying around him.
You are asked to go to the store by your parents. You don't.
He does exactly what he is told even if it puts his life in danger.
You stay at home and watch TV.
He takes whatever time he is given to call, write home, sleep, and
eat.
You crawl into your soft bed, with down pillows, and get comfortable.
He tries to sleep but gets woken by mortars and helicopters all night
long.
If you support your troops, send this to 7 people.
If you don't support your troops well, then don't send this out. You
won't die in 7 days, your love life won't be affected, and you won't
have the worst day ever.
You don't have to email this. It's not like you know the men and
women that are dying to preserve your rights.
REMEMBER our Troops, and do not forget them LATER
Lest we forget -
Meaning of Birthdate
| Your Birthdate: October 28 |
 You have a Type A personality so big it makes other Type A's shrink away in shame. You never shy away from adversity - and you love to tackle impossible problems. Failure is not an option for you, and more than a few people are put off by your ego. You tend to be controlling, and you hate leaving anything up to chance. Your strength: Your bold approach to life Your weakness: You don't accept help Your power color: Bronze Your power symbol: Pyramid Your power month: October |
When I say I'm Saving The World...
Hi Angel,
You have the following unread Care2 Network Messages:
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Get Your Members of Congress on the Punch Clock' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make Sure Every Vote Counts' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make Sure Women Can Get Their Prescription for Birth Control Filled!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Say No to the "Big Brother" Bills - Protect Our Civil Liberties!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help America Declare Energy Independence' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Boycott C.K. Mondavi and Charles Krug Wines' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Wal-Mart to Keep Their Environmental Promise' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Wal-Mart's CEO a Reality Check!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Kimberly-Clark: Use Recycled Paper Instead of Old Forests!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Gale Norton to Do Her Job and Protect Wolves!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help Bears Threatened by Poaching' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop the killing of seals in Canada' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell eBay To Stop Selling Slaughtered Bats!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress to Protect Our Oceans' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Exempt Manatees from The Marine Mammal Protection Act!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop New Pollution and Global Security Threats from Nuclear Waste' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Demand House Republicans Denounce Ann Coulter's Hate-Speech' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Urgent: Don't Let the Atrocities in Darfur Continue' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support the Peace Plan That Brings Iraq Troops Home!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't let Congress Contaminate Food Safety Laws' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't let Congress Contaminate Food Safety Laws' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress Animal Testing Has No Place in Federal Agencies' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Risk Another Nuclear Showdown: Support Direct Negotiations with Iran Now' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Starbucks to Honor Their Commitments to Coffee Farmers' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Let Another Dog Get Chained Up in Your Town' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Enforce the Roadless Rule for National Forests' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition America's National Parks Face a Crisis - Support the Plan to Fix Them' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Poison More Prairie Dogs' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Unlawful Government Spying on U.S. Citizens' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Unlawful Government Spying on U.S. Citizens' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Unlawful Government Spying on U.S. Citizens' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Our Voices Together: Build a Safer World' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Dolphin Slaughter in Japan' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Urge U.S. Turkey Producers to End Unsafe Practice' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition It's Always Christmas Time...For Visa!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Bush's Ultra-Conservative Appointee to Health and Human Services' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Bush's Ultra-Conservative Appointee to Health and Human Services' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Encourage International Paper to Fix Our Paper Packaging Problem' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Wal-Mart: Zero Tolerance on Child Labor' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Every Child's Right To Survival' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Darfur Women from Abuse and Genocide' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Keep the Promise to Fight Poverty' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Strip ESA Protections From Wolves in WY and ID' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition USDA Must Stop Playing Chicken with Food Safety' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Wildlife in Bristol Bay from Oil Drilling' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stand Up for Living Wages for All Working People' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support UN Refugee Agency Action in Darfur' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Get Engaged for Valentine's Day!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Get Engaged for Valentine's Day!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Big Drug Company to Deny Poor People Life-saving Medicines' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect North America’s Boreal Forest' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect North America’s Boreal Forest' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect North America’s Boreal Forest' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Washington D.C. Deserves Equal Rights' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Let Big Retailers Pass Fees on to You!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition AT&T and Verizon: Don't Share Our Personal Information' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Violence Against Women & Girls' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Global Warming: Urge Presidential Hopefuls to Take a Stand!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Up Something That Contributes to Global Warming For Lent!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Repeal the Discriminatory "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Policy' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Repeal the Discriminatory "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Policy' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Oppose the Killing of Cats' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Oppose the Killing of Cats' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition President Bush: Implement the Energy Policy That Works!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition President Bush: Implement the Energy Policy That Works!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Bring Senate Campaigns into the 21st Century Sunlight!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress: Stand up for patients, not drug companies!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help Lower Drug Prices for Millions of Americans' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make Farm and Food Policy Meet the Needs of All Americans' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make Farm and Food Policy Meet the Needs of All Americans' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Sea Turtles from Extinction - Take the Plastic Bag Pledge' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition CEO and Execs Take Nearly $200 Million and Workers Get Nothing' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition CEO and Execs Take Nearly $200 Million and Workers Get Nothing' from Care2
'A message from your favorite sea turtle' from Mr Leatherback Turtle
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Become a Citizen Co-Sponsor of the Sanders/Boxer Global Warming Bill' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Poor Farmers a Fighting Chance' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress That America's Safety Depends on Wireless Access!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support Effective and Real Global Warming Action' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Thank CA Senator for Her Efforts to Protect Domestic Violence Victims and Their Pets' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Thank State of Illinois for Preventing the Criminalization of Canines' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support Proposal to List Polar Bears As "Threatened"' from Care2
'Who do you think will win?' from Mr Leatherback Turtle
'Butterfly for: Signing petition The Time is Now for Global Warming Action' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support a Greener Farm Bill and "Sow Justice"' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Say No to Mining in Alaska's Pristine Bristol Bay!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition We Need a New Attorney General!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress: Stop Starving Our Food Safety System!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Tigers: Urge China to Maintain Ban on Trade in Tiger Parts' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Tigers: Urge China to Maintain Ban on Trade in Tiger Parts' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Out of Control Gas Prices, Increase Fuel Efficiency Standards!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Allow Health Care Patients Access to Therapy - Not Time Behind Bars' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Congress: Deliver on Health Care for Those Who Need it Most!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help Stop Dangerous "Super Bug" in Local Hospitals!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition GOP Senators: Bring Our Troops Home From Iraq!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Celebrate Shelter Cats With a Thank You to the Houston SPCA!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Forget Hurricane Katrina and Rita Victims!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition ALL Children and Pregnant Women Deserve Health Coverage!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Unite With the Lance Armstrong Foundation to Fight Cancer' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tucker Carlson: Apologize Now for Comments Condoning Violence!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Lick Elmo!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Improve Support for Hard-Hit Families' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Baby Calves Stolen From Their Mothers and Treated Cruelly - Free Baby Mendes!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Ancient Trees and Spotted Owls!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Workplace Discrimination: Pass ENDA Now!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress: Support Cool Cars and Clean Energy' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Send Congress Their Global Warming To-Do List!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Urge Congress to Permanently Protect the Arctic Refuge!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Oppose the destructive practice of mountaintop removal mining' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support Girls in Sports - Sign the 'Fair Play Now' Pledge!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Hold the Antibiotics!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Supreme Court Decisions are Chipping Away our Civil Rights!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Include Older Americans in Health Care Improvements!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition All Foster Children Deserve Permanent Homes and Loving Families' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Polar Bears from Extinction!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell the Senate to Support Food Aid That Helps, Not Hurts' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Thank American Humane for Rescue and Care of Puppy Mill Victims!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Lay the Reckless 1872 Mining Law to Rest!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition It's Your Choice: Endorse Hillary's Health Care Plan!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Demand Rush Limbaugh Apologize!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Let Big Companies Privatize Our Most Precious Natural Resource!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support the Healthy Families Act' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Animal Suffering Worldwide - Sign the Petition for a Universal Declaration on Animal Welfare!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Let President Bush's Veto of Children's Healthcare Stand!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help End Youth Homelessness in the United States' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Chimpanzees from the Bushmeat Trade!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Cuts That will Limit Patients' Access to Health Care' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Us a Plan for a Nuclear Weapon-Free World!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make AIDS History: Support the Search for an AIDS Vaccine' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Take Action to Improve Cancer Care!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Keep Hazardous Toys Off Our Shelves' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Take Action to Support Conservation Programs for Farmers' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Elect Teddy for President!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Share Your Story: Working Families Struggling to Find Affordable Homes' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Join Leonardo DiCaprio in Protecting Critical Habitat for Polar Bears' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Take Action to Prevent Pediatric HIV/AIDS Around the World' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop the Lies About Immigration - Don't Broadcast Tom Tancredo's Ad' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition America's Brave Heroes Deserve Adequate Medical Care!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition This Holiday Season, Pledge to Give' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Darfur Kids Stability Through Education' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Pediatrics Over Partisanship - Tell Bush, "Not Another SCHIP Veto!"' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Bush Your Performance Review on Workers' Rights!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Puerto Rico Pet Massacre' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Boycott ExxonMobil' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Environmentally-Friendly Transportation Under Attack! Stop Train Reregulatation' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Japan's Whaling Fleet From Killing Humpbacks!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support the PAW Act - End Alaska's Aerial Hunting Program!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect the Amazon's Madeira River!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Wetlands in Missisippi! Stop the Yazoo Pumps' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Cloned Food - Act Today!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition I join Al Gore in calling for a new, visionary global treaty to solve the climate crisis' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Whaling NOW!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Bring America's Clean Energy Future to Life' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Japan Killing More Whales - Stop the Hunt!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop the Bush/Cheney Sneak Attack on Wolves' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support St. Jude Children's Research Hospital® -- Give back to children this season' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition No Offshore Drilling in Polar Bear Habitat!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Time for Bioenergy to Get Smart' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Deceptive Labeling of "Natural" Meat' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Sustainable Shrimp for all Grocery Stores!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Reauthorize Runaway and Homeless Youth Programs!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help American Humane Celebrate Their 130th Anniversary!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Our Wildlife - Jumpstart a Clean Energy Future!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition FedEx Ground: Your Drivers Deserve to be Treated Fairly!' from Care2
You have the following unread Care2 Network Messages:
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Get Your Members of Congress on the Punch Clock' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make Sure Every Vote Counts' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make Sure Women Can Get Their Prescription for Birth Control Filled!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Say No to the "Big Brother" Bills - Protect Our Civil Liberties!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help America Declare Energy Independence' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Boycott C.K. Mondavi and Charles Krug Wines' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Wal-Mart to Keep Their Environmental Promise' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Wal-Mart's CEO a Reality Check!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Kimberly-Clark: Use Recycled Paper Instead of Old Forests!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Gale Norton to Do Her Job and Protect Wolves!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help Bears Threatened by Poaching' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop the killing of seals in Canada' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell eBay To Stop Selling Slaughtered Bats!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress to Protect Our Oceans' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Exempt Manatees from The Marine Mammal Protection Act!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop New Pollution and Global Security Threats from Nuclear Waste' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Demand House Republicans Denounce Ann Coulter's Hate-Speech' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Urgent: Don't Let the Atrocities in Darfur Continue' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support the Peace Plan That Brings Iraq Troops Home!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't let Congress Contaminate Food Safety Laws' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't let Congress Contaminate Food Safety Laws' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress Animal Testing Has No Place in Federal Agencies' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Risk Another Nuclear Showdown: Support Direct Negotiations with Iran Now' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Starbucks to Honor Their Commitments to Coffee Farmers' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Let Another Dog Get Chained Up in Your Town' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Enforce the Roadless Rule for National Forests' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition America's National Parks Face a Crisis - Support the Plan to Fix Them' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Poison More Prairie Dogs' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Unlawful Government Spying on U.S. Citizens' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Unlawful Government Spying on U.S. Citizens' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Unlawful Government Spying on U.S. Citizens' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Our Voices Together: Build a Safer World' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Dolphin Slaughter in Japan' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Urge U.S. Turkey Producers to End Unsafe Practice' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition It's Always Christmas Time...For Visa!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Bush's Ultra-Conservative Appointee to Health and Human Services' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Bush's Ultra-Conservative Appointee to Health and Human Services' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Encourage International Paper to Fix Our Paper Packaging Problem' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Wal-Mart: Zero Tolerance on Child Labor' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Every Child's Right To Survival' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Darfur Women from Abuse and Genocide' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Keep the Promise to Fight Poverty' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Strip ESA Protections From Wolves in WY and ID' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition USDA Must Stop Playing Chicken with Food Safety' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Wildlife in Bristol Bay from Oil Drilling' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stand Up for Living Wages for All Working People' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support UN Refugee Agency Action in Darfur' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Get Engaged for Valentine's Day!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Get Engaged for Valentine's Day!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Big Drug Company to Deny Poor People Life-saving Medicines' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect North America’s Boreal Forest' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect North America’s Boreal Forest' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect North America’s Boreal Forest' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Washington D.C. Deserves Equal Rights' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Let Big Retailers Pass Fees on to You!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition AT&T and Verizon: Don't Share Our Personal Information' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Violence Against Women & Girls' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Global Warming: Urge Presidential Hopefuls to Take a Stand!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Up Something That Contributes to Global Warming For Lent!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Repeal the Discriminatory "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Policy' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Repeal the Discriminatory "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" Policy' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Oppose the Killing of Cats' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Oppose the Killing of Cats' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition President Bush: Implement the Energy Policy That Works!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition President Bush: Implement the Energy Policy That Works!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Bring Senate Campaigns into the 21st Century Sunlight!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress: Stand up for patients, not drug companies!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help Lower Drug Prices for Millions of Americans' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make Farm and Food Policy Meet the Needs of All Americans' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make Farm and Food Policy Meet the Needs of All Americans' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Sea Turtles from Extinction - Take the Plastic Bag Pledge' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition CEO and Execs Take Nearly $200 Million and Workers Get Nothing' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition CEO and Execs Take Nearly $200 Million and Workers Get Nothing' from Care2
'A message from your favorite sea turtle' from Mr Leatherback Turtle
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Become a Citizen Co-Sponsor of the Sanders/Boxer Global Warming Bill' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Poor Farmers a Fighting Chance' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress That America's Safety Depends on Wireless Access!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support Effective and Real Global Warming Action' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Thank CA Senator for Her Efforts to Protect Domestic Violence Victims and Their Pets' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Thank State of Illinois for Preventing the Criminalization of Canines' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support Proposal to List Polar Bears As "Threatened"' from Care2
'Who do you think will win?' from Mr Leatherback Turtle
'Butterfly for: Signing petition The Time is Now for Global Warming Action' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support a Greener Farm Bill and "Sow Justice"' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Say No to Mining in Alaska's Pristine Bristol Bay!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition We Need a New Attorney General!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress: Stop Starving Our Food Safety System!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Tigers: Urge China to Maintain Ban on Trade in Tiger Parts' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Tigers: Urge China to Maintain Ban on Trade in Tiger Parts' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Out of Control Gas Prices, Increase Fuel Efficiency Standards!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Allow Health Care Patients Access to Therapy - Not Time Behind Bars' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Congress: Deliver on Health Care for Those Who Need it Most!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help Stop Dangerous "Super Bug" in Local Hospitals!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition GOP Senators: Bring Our Troops Home From Iraq!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Celebrate Shelter Cats With a Thank You to the Houston SPCA!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Forget Hurricane Katrina and Rita Victims!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition ALL Children and Pregnant Women Deserve Health Coverage!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Unite With the Lance Armstrong Foundation to Fight Cancer' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tucker Carlson: Apologize Now for Comments Condoning Violence!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Lick Elmo!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Improve Support for Hard-Hit Families' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Baby Calves Stolen From Their Mothers and Treated Cruelly - Free Baby Mendes!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Ancient Trees and Spotted Owls!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Workplace Discrimination: Pass ENDA Now!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell Congress: Support Cool Cars and Clean Energy' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Send Congress Their Global Warming To-Do List!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Urge Congress to Permanently Protect the Arctic Refuge!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Oppose the destructive practice of mountaintop removal mining' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support Girls in Sports - Sign the 'Fair Play Now' Pledge!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Hold the Antibiotics!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Supreme Court Decisions are Chipping Away our Civil Rights!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Include Older Americans in Health Care Improvements!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition All Foster Children Deserve Permanent Homes and Loving Families' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Polar Bears from Extinction!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Tell the Senate to Support Food Aid That Helps, Not Hurts' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Thank American Humane for Rescue and Care of Puppy Mill Victims!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Lay the Reckless 1872 Mining Law to Rest!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition It's Your Choice: Endorse Hillary's Health Care Plan!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Demand Rush Limbaugh Apologize!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Let Big Companies Privatize Our Most Precious Natural Resource!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support the Healthy Families Act' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Animal Suffering Worldwide - Sign the Petition for a Universal Declaration on Animal Welfare!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Don't Let President Bush's Veto of Children's Healthcare Stand!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help End Youth Homelessness in the United States' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Chimpanzees from the Bushmeat Trade!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Cuts That will Limit Patients' Access to Health Care' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Us a Plan for a Nuclear Weapon-Free World!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Make AIDS History: Support the Search for an AIDS Vaccine' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Take Action to Improve Cancer Care!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Keep Hazardous Toys Off Our Shelves' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Take Action to Support Conservation Programs for Farmers' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Elect Teddy for President!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Share Your Story: Working Families Struggling to Find Affordable Homes' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Join Leonardo DiCaprio in Protecting Critical Habitat for Polar Bears' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Take Action to Prevent Pediatric HIV/AIDS Around the World' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop the Lies About Immigration - Don't Broadcast Tom Tancredo's Ad' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition America's Brave Heroes Deserve Adequate Medical Care!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition This Holiday Season, Pledge to Give' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Darfur Kids Stability Through Education' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Pediatrics Over Partisanship - Tell Bush, "Not Another SCHIP Veto!"' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Give Bush Your Performance Review on Workers' Rights!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Puerto Rico Pet Massacre' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Boycott ExxonMobil' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Environmentally-Friendly Transportation Under Attack! Stop Train Reregulatation' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Japan's Whaling Fleet From Killing Humpbacks!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support the PAW Act - End Alaska's Aerial Hunting Program!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect the Amazon's Madeira River!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Save Wetlands in Missisippi! Stop the Yazoo Pumps' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Cloned Food - Act Today!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition I join Al Gore in calling for a new, visionary global treaty to solve the climate crisis' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition End Whaling NOW!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Bring America's Clean Energy Future to Life' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Japan Killing More Whales - Stop the Hunt!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop the Bush/Cheney Sneak Attack on Wolves' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Support St. Jude Children's Research Hospital® -- Give back to children this season' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition No Offshore Drilling in Polar Bear Habitat!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Time for Bioenergy to Get Smart' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Stop Deceptive Labeling of "Natural" Meat' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Sustainable Shrimp for all Grocery Stores!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Reauthorize Runaway and Homeless Youth Programs!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Help American Humane Celebrate Their 130th Anniversary!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition Protect Our Wildlife - Jumpstart a Clean Energy Future!' from Care2
'Butterfly for: Signing petition FedEx Ground: Your Drivers Deserve to be Treated Fairly!' from Care2
Handprints
| What Your Hands Say About You |
 Flexible and broad minded, you can fit in to any situation. There's no telling where your life will take you. Consistent and reliable, you like to count on structure and routine in your life. Your emotions tend to be well though out. You're willing to wait out a bad situation, and you're never too quick to act. |
Thursday, January 17, 2008
More Naughty...ish....jokes....
Chinese Proverbs
Virginity like bubble - one prick all goneMan who run in front of car get tiredMan who run behind car get exhaustedMan with hand in pocket feel cocky all dayFoolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organMan who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to BangkokMan with one chopstick go hungryMan who scratches ass should not bite fingernailsMan who eat many prunes get good run for moneyBaseball is wrong, man with four balls cannot walkPanties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earthWar doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is leftWife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat houseMan who fight with wife all day get no piece at nightIt take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill itMan who drive like hell bound to get thereMan who stand on toilet is high on potMan who lives in glass house should change clothes in basementMan who fishes in other man's well often catches crabsMan who farts in church sits in own pewCrowded elevator smells different to midget
One day a construction worker left the job a little early, and when he got home he found his wife in bed with another man. Purple with rage, he hauled the man down the stairs and into the garage where he proceeded to secure his dick in a vice.Utterly terrified, the man screamed, "Stop, stop! you're not going to cut it off, are you? ARE YOU?""Nope," replied the construction worker, "You are...I'm going to set the garage on fire."
Hung Chow calls in to work and says, "Hey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomachache and my legs hurt. I not come work."The boss says, "You know Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her give me sex. Makes everything better and I can go to work. You try."Two hours later Hung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got nice house."
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole.
Think First
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I Turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word... he knew better.I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts . As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me forget.While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were screams of laughter.Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny. So, of course, I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then, I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said, "No." I kept thinking, " Oh Lord, that child has had an accident and I don't have a change of clothes for him." Then I said, "Danny are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "NO," he replied. I just KNEW he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled. "SEE MOM,IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing! He calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any....a true story.. We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
True story, I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."The moral of this story is:""Always keep your condoms in your car."
Guy Things
"I'M GOING FISHING"Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.""IT'S A GUY THING"Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical"."CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?""UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response."IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"Means: "I have no idea how it works.""I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra.""TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.""THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."Means: "Are you still talking?""YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday.""I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES".Means: "The girl selling them on the corner had great tits.""OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt.""HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING".Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon.""I CAN'T FIND IT."Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless.""WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"Means: "What did you catch me at?""I HEARD YOU."Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me.""YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE"Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse.""YOU LOOK TERRIFIC"Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving.""I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."Means: "No one will ever see us alive again.""WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK"Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."
Virginity like bubble - one prick all goneMan who run in front of car get tiredMan who run behind car get exhaustedMan with hand in pocket feel cocky all dayFoolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organMan who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to BangkokMan with one chopstick go hungryMan who scratches ass should not bite fingernailsMan who eat many prunes get good run for moneyBaseball is wrong, man with four balls cannot walkPanties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earthWar doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is leftWife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat houseMan who fight with wife all day get no piece at nightIt take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill itMan who drive like hell bound to get thereMan who stand on toilet is high on potMan who lives in glass house should change clothes in basementMan who fishes in other man's well often catches crabsMan who farts in church sits in own pewCrowded elevator smells different to midget
One day a construction worker left the job a little early, and when he got home he found his wife in bed with another man. Purple with rage, he hauled the man down the stairs and into the garage where he proceeded to secure his dick in a vice.Utterly terrified, the man screamed, "Stop, stop! you're not going to cut it off, are you? ARE YOU?""Nope," replied the construction worker, "You are...I'm going to set the garage on fire."
Hung Chow calls in to work and says, "Hey, boss I not come work today, I really sick. I got headache, stomachache and my legs hurt. I not come work."The boss says, "You know Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her give me sex. Makes everything better and I can go to work. You try."Two hours later Hung Chow calls again: "Boss, I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got nice house."
Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole.
Think First
Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did....I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I Turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word... he knew better.I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts . As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me forget.While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were screams of laughter.Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny. So, of course, I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then, I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said, "No." I kept thinking, " Oh Lord, that child has had an accident and I don't have a change of clothes for him." Then I said, "Danny are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "NO," he replied. I just KNEW he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled. "SEE MOM,IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing! He calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any....a true story.. We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!
True story, I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."The moral of this story is:""Always keep your condoms in your car."
Guy Things
"I'M GOING FISHING"Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.""IT'S A GUY THING"Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical"."CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?""UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response."IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"Means: "I have no idea how it works.""I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra.""TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.""THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."Means: "Are you still talking?""YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday.""I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES".Means: "The girl selling them on the corner had great tits.""OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt.""HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING".Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon.""I CAN'T FIND IT."Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless.""WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"Means: "What did you catch me at?""I HEARD YOU."Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me.""YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE"Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse.""YOU LOOK TERRIFIC"Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving.""I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."Means: "No one will ever see us alive again.""WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK"Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."
Disclaimer...Randy Jokes!
There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband insisted on shutting off the light. Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights. She looked down and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated leisure device... Avibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a realone. She went completely ballistic. "You impotentbastard," she screamed at him, "How could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!" The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly: "I'll explain the toy . . You explain the3 kids."
3 men went to a night club looking to pick up chicks.One of the guys saw the hottest chick he'd ever seen. "I'm gonna talk to her", he said. "NO NO NO" said the other 2 guys. "She'll mess you up real bad!"The guy went over and talked to her anyway. They talked for awhile and then went back to her apartment and started to get down to business.2 minutes in he had to quit."I can't take it any more! It's too rough," he said."Alright," she said "I'll be back in a minute."A couple minutes later she returned and they started again, now it was really smooth and nice. "How did you fix that?" he asked. "I picked the scabs and let them puss." she replied!
Mike goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this great big huge guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says, "7 feet tall, 350 lbs, 20 inch penis, testicles 3 lbs each, Turner Brown."Mike just faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big dude kneels down and brings him to, by slapping his face and shaking him. He asks, "Are you OK??" In a very weak voice Mike says, "Excuse me, but what did you just say to me?"The big dude says, "When I saw the curious look on your face, I just figured I'd give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. "I'm 7 feet tall, weigh 350 lbs, have a 20 inch penis, my testicles weigh 3 lbs each, and my name is Turner Brown." Mike said, "Oh Thank God!!! I thought you said 'Turn Around!'"
A Professor was giving a lecture on "Involuntary Muscular Contractions" to his first year medical students. Realizing that this was not the most riveting subject, the Professor decided to give an example his students could relate to.He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, "Do you know what your ass hole is doing while you're having an orgasm?" She replied, "He's probably golfing with his friends."
One day while doing door-to-door market research, this guy knocks on a door and is greeted by a beautiful young housewife."Hello," he starts, "I"m doing some research for a petroleum jelly manufacturer. Have you ever used the product??"Yes. My husband and I use it during sex" she answers.The researcher is taken aback. "Um, er, I admire you for your honesty," he continues. "Can you tell me exactly how you use it?""Sure, we put it on the doorknob so the kids can't get in."
A guy sees his buddy in a bar and says, "You're not going to believe this,but I've got a wild nymphomaniac in my car out in the parking lot. She's wearing me out! Can you go out to the car and keep her busy? The dome light is off, so she won't know you're not me!"His friend agrees and goes out to his car. They climb into the back seat and start going at it. A few minutes later, a cop sees them and starts banging on the window, shining his flashlight inside. "What the hell do you two think you're doing?" The guy says, "Oh, there's nothing wrong, she's my wife."The cop says, "Oh, sorry,I didn't know." The guy says "Neither did I until you shined that light in here."
An amish woman and her daughter were riding in an old buggy one cold blustery day. The daughter said to her mother, "My hands are freezing cold." the mother replied "Put them between your legs. Your body heat will warm them up." The daughter did and her hands warmed up.The next day the daughter was riding with her boyfriend who said, "My hands are freezing cold." The girl replied, "Put them between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm them up." He did and warmed his hands. The following day the boyfriend was again in the buggy with the daughter. He said, "My nose is cold." The girl replied "Put it between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm it up." He did and warmed his nose. The next day the boyfriend was again driving with the daughter and he said, "My penis is frozen solid."The following day the daughter was driving in the buggy with her mother, and she says to her mother, "Have you ever heard of a penis?" Slightly concerned the mother said, "Why, yes. Why do you ask?" The daughter replies, "They make one hell of a mess when they defrost, don't they?"
A cop is patrolling Lover's Lane when he sees the strangest thing. A young teenage couple is sitting in a car, the guy in the front and the girl in the back. The guy is reading a magazine and the girl appears to be knitting.He stops the patrol car and walks over to knock on the young man's window. He rolls the window down."Yes officer?""I have to ask you, what are you doing?""Well sir, I am reading a magazine.""What about the young lady in the backseat?"The young man turns to look behind him. "Well, I think she is knitting a pullover sweater.""How old are you young man?" the officer asks."I am 25 Officer.""And the girl?"The young man looks at his watch. "Well, she'll be 18 in 11 minutes."
One day a cat dies of natural causes and goes to heaven. Greeting him the Lord says, "You've lived a good life. If there is any way I can make your stay in Heaven more comfortable, please let Me know."The cat thinks for a minute and says "Well, all my life I lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wooden floor..." The Lord stops the cat and says "Say no more!" Just then a wonderful fluffy pillow appears and the cat contentedly wanders off to find a good place to nap.A few days later six mice killed in a tragic farming accident go to heaven. The Lord is there to greet them with the same offer. The mice answer: "All of our lives we've been chased. We've had to run from cats, from tractors, even from that farmer's wife with her broom. We're tired of running..." "Say no more!" The Lord replies. In a flash, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful new pair of roller skates, and they skate happily off to explore the Heavenly landscape.About a week later The Lord stops by to see the cat and finds him snoozing away. He gently wakes the cat and asks, "How are things since you got here?"The cat stretches, yawns, and replies "Oh, it is wonderful here. I get a lot of great sleep on this pillow, and those Meals On Wheels you've been sending are the BEST!!!"
3 men went to a night club looking to pick up chicks.One of the guys saw the hottest chick he'd ever seen. "I'm gonna talk to her", he said. "NO NO NO" said the other 2 guys. "She'll mess you up real bad!"The guy went over and talked to her anyway. They talked for awhile and then went back to her apartment and started to get down to business.2 minutes in he had to quit."I can't take it any more! It's too rough," he said."Alright," she said "I'll be back in a minute."A couple minutes later she returned and they started again, now it was really smooth and nice. "How did you fix that?" he asked. "I picked the scabs and let them puss." she replied!
Mike goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this great big huge guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says, "7 feet tall, 350 lbs, 20 inch penis, testicles 3 lbs each, Turner Brown."Mike just faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big dude kneels down and brings him to, by slapping his face and shaking him. He asks, "Are you OK??" In a very weak voice Mike says, "Excuse me, but what did you just say to me?"The big dude says, "When I saw the curious look on your face, I just figured I'd give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. "I'm 7 feet tall, weigh 350 lbs, have a 20 inch penis, my testicles weigh 3 lbs each, and my name is Turner Brown." Mike said, "Oh Thank God!!! I thought you said 'Turn Around!'"
A Professor was giving a lecture on "Involuntary Muscular Contractions" to his first year medical students. Realizing that this was not the most riveting subject, the Professor decided to give an example his students could relate to.He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, "Do you know what your ass hole is doing while you're having an orgasm?" She replied, "He's probably golfing with his friends."
One day while doing door-to-door market research, this guy knocks on a door and is greeted by a beautiful young housewife."Hello," he starts, "I"m doing some research for a petroleum jelly manufacturer. Have you ever used the product??"Yes. My husband and I use it during sex" she answers.The researcher is taken aback. "Um, er, I admire you for your honesty," he continues. "Can you tell me exactly how you use it?""Sure, we put it on the doorknob so the kids can't get in."
A guy sees his buddy in a bar and says, "You're not going to believe this,but I've got a wild nymphomaniac in my car out in the parking lot. She's wearing me out! Can you go out to the car and keep her busy? The dome light is off, so she won't know you're not me!"His friend agrees and goes out to his car. They climb into the back seat and start going at it. A few minutes later, a cop sees them and starts banging on the window, shining his flashlight inside. "What the hell do you two think you're doing?" The guy says, "Oh, there's nothing wrong, she's my wife."The cop says, "Oh, sorry,I didn't know." The guy says "Neither did I until you shined that light in here."
An amish woman and her daughter were riding in an old buggy one cold blustery day. The daughter said to her mother, "My hands are freezing cold." the mother replied "Put them between your legs. Your body heat will warm them up." The daughter did and her hands warmed up.The next day the daughter was riding with her boyfriend who said, "My hands are freezing cold." The girl replied, "Put them between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm them up." He did and warmed his hands. The following day the boyfriend was again in the buggy with the daughter. He said, "My nose is cold." The girl replied "Put it between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm it up." He did and warmed his nose. The next day the boyfriend was again driving with the daughter and he said, "My penis is frozen solid."The following day the daughter was driving in the buggy with her mother, and she says to her mother, "Have you ever heard of a penis?" Slightly concerned the mother said, "Why, yes. Why do you ask?" The daughter replies, "They make one hell of a mess when they defrost, don't they?"
A cop is patrolling Lover's Lane when he sees the strangest thing. A young teenage couple is sitting in a car, the guy in the front and the girl in the back. The guy is reading a magazine and the girl appears to be knitting.He stops the patrol car and walks over to knock on the young man's window. He rolls the window down."Yes officer?""I have to ask you, what are you doing?""Well sir, I am reading a magazine.""What about the young lady in the backseat?"The young man turns to look behind him. "Well, I think she is knitting a pullover sweater.""How old are you young man?" the officer asks."I am 25 Officer.""And the girl?"The young man looks at his watch. "Well, she'll be 18 in 11 minutes."
One day a cat dies of natural causes and goes to heaven. Greeting him the Lord says, "You've lived a good life. If there is any way I can make your stay in Heaven more comfortable, please let Me know."The cat thinks for a minute and says "Well, all my life I lived with a poor family and had to sleep on a hard wooden floor..." The Lord stops the cat and says "Say no more!" Just then a wonderful fluffy pillow appears and the cat contentedly wanders off to find a good place to nap.A few days later six mice killed in a tragic farming accident go to heaven. The Lord is there to greet them with the same offer. The mice answer: "All of our lives we've been chased. We've had to run from cats, from tractors, even from that farmer's wife with her broom. We're tired of running..." "Say no more!" The Lord replies. In a flash, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful new pair of roller skates, and they skate happily off to explore the Heavenly landscape.About a week later The Lord stops by to see the cat and finds him snoozing away. He gently wakes the cat and asks, "How are things since you got here?"The cat stretches, yawns, and replies "Oh, it is wonderful here. I get a lot of great sleep on this pillow, and those Meals On Wheels you've been sending are the BEST!!!"
IN THE NAME OF CHOCOLATE!
SAY GOODBYE HERSHEY A sad story for those of us who remember growing up with Hershey bars, and just as sad for the generations of today. What will be outsourced next?
Pennsylvania is a big state, but it amazes me in this day, how some news doesn't make it over the mountain to the front page of our papers or the top of our news hours in Western Pennsylvania. Milton Hershey, this year, will be joining H. J Heinz in rolling over in his grave. Hershey Chocolate is moving to MEXICO...whoopee! They're even closing down Hershey Canada. Don't buy any more Hershey Bars. Rees e's Peanut Butter Cups are my favorite and they are made by Hershey. But, I will not purchase another one! M.S. Hershey had a dream... I will buy my OWN Sugar, Milk, Cocoa beans, (all natural mind you!) and make candy...(no tariffs etc..) EVEN during the depression...HE and the Company made money...NOW some Corporate big wigs are ruining the name... AND the product M.S. created... Please pass it on...What a bunch of college educated "idiots". Thank you M.S. Hershey for all the things I have and all you have done for me and my family..."I" do appreciate it... as for "Dick" Lenny and Company, good luck you greedy, money loving JERKS ... you are ruining the name, the company, and MANY lives in central Pennsylvania.... read on...Enough is Enough! So Hershey executives are closing plants in the US, laying off over a thousand people, and destroying Mr. Hershey's dream, all to cut labor, material costs and AVOID PAYING ANY US TAXES! The company will save about $170 million a year, all on the backs of the American people. The top executives will still make their mega bucks and the laid off workers will have to find other jobs, some probably at minimum wage due to their age. All this to take their jobs to India, China a nd Mexico, so WHAT part of the "GREAT" American Chocolate Bar is left?... NOTHING! These countries are no doubt laughing at the Americans, who they don't like anyway. How long are the American people going to sit around and let big corporations do this to us? We must all band together and let our Politicians in Washington know we have had it with NAFTA, CAFTA and "SHAFTA" and we won't take it any longer! Please, do not buy any Hershey product! If the company wants to take the work to these countries, then let those countries buy the product. We don't need it! Please pass this to everyone on your email list so it gets all across the United States.
Pennsylvania is a big state, but it amazes me in this day, how some news doesn't make it over the mountain to the front page of our papers or the top of our news hours in Western Pennsylvania. Milton Hershey, this year, will be joining H. J Heinz in rolling over in his grave. Hershey Chocolate is moving to MEXICO...whoopee! They're even closing down Hershey Canada. Don't buy any more Hershey Bars. Rees e's Peanut Butter Cups are my favorite and they are made by Hershey. But, I will not purchase another one! M.S. Hershey had a dream... I will buy my OWN Sugar, Milk, Cocoa beans, (all natural mind you!) and make candy...(no tariffs etc..) EVEN during the depression...HE and the Company made money...NOW some Corporate big wigs are ruining the name... AND the product M.S. created... Please pass it on...What a bunch of college educated "idiots". Thank you M.S. Hershey for all the things I have and all you have done for me and my family..."I" do appreciate it... as for "Dick" Lenny and Company, good luck you greedy, money loving JERKS ... you are ruining the name, the company, and MANY lives in central Pennsylvania.... read on...Enough is Enough! So Hershey executives are closing plants in the US, laying off over a thousand people, and destroying Mr. Hershey's dream, all to cut labor, material costs and AVOID PAYING ANY US TAXES! The company will save about $170 million a year, all on the backs of the American people. The top executives will still make their mega bucks and the laid off workers will have to find other jobs, some probably at minimum wage due to their age. All this to take their jobs to India, China a nd Mexico, so WHAT part of the "GREAT" American Chocolate Bar is left?... NOTHING! These countries are no doubt laughing at the Americans, who they don't like anyway. How long are the American people going to sit around and let big corporations do this to us? We must all band together and let our Politicians in Washington know we have had it with NAFTA, CAFTA and "SHAFTA" and we won't take it any longer! Please, do not buy any Hershey product! If the company wants to take the work to these countries, then let those countries buy the product. We don't need it! Please pass this to everyone on your email list so it gets all across the United States.
Angelz Got Jokez
The Story of Adam & Eve's PetsAdam and Eve said, 'Lord, when we were in the garden,you walked with us every day. Now we do not see youany more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficultfor us to remember how much you love us.' And God said, I will create a companion for you thatwill be with you and who will be a reflection of mylove for you, so that you will love me even when youcannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childishor unlovable you may be, this new companion willaccept you as you are and will love you as I do, inspite of yourselves. And God created a new animal to be a companion forAdam and Eve. And it was a good animal And God was pleased. And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eveand he wagged his tail . And Adam said, 'Lord, I have already named all theanimals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a namefor this new animal.' And God said, 'I have created this new animal to be areflection of my love for you, his name will be areflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG.'And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion tothem and loved them. And they were comforted And God was pleased. And Dog was content and wagged his tail. After a while, it came to pass that an angel came tothe Lord and said, 'Lord, Adam and Eve have becomefilled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocksand they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog hasindeed taught them that they are loved, but perhapstoo well.' And God said, 'I will create for them a companion whowill be with them and who will see them as they are.The companion will remind them of their limitations,so they will know that they are not always worthy ofadoration.' And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Evegazed into Cat's eyes, they were reminded that theywere not the supreme beings. And Adam and Eve learned humility. And they were greatly improved. And God was pleased . . . . . . And Dog was happy. . . . . And Cat didn't give a shit one way or other....
WARNING...This is a RANT!
Damn it. I tipped a whole Diet Dew over onto my favorite comfy blanky this morn. That sucks most vigorously. I finally got some sleep until I awoke cause it was too damn hot in the house. A certain 18 year old I won't mention names....turned the thermostat up AGAIN even though she was asked several times over and over to leave it the hell alone. It was on 75 and my bed is right next to the heater and it dries out my skin and my sinuses but all i can hear her say it is cold....well we have TONS of blankets and you can put on more clothes, I can only take so much off. When i can't even sleep naked cause it is too hot with a fan something has to give. I run a fever naturally. I am going to start opening the damn door in the living room like I used to. Geez, I have made a lot of changes to be more thoughtful of my family and still she does as she pleases. It takes forever to cool this place down. I mean geez. i was actually SLEEPING for once.
Bah! I also found my foot in pain and bloody this morning. Why? No, not itching with my nails but at some point in the night I rubbed it against the connector to my oxygen hose. So ow.
Back to griping about the heat...another thing that doesn't help is my oxygen concentrator puts out a lot of hot air as well.
Let's jump back to the soda soaked blanky. My Idea was to watch as many of my DVR shows then come in my room and find my flashlight I lost last night...yes, I have a flashlight by my bed so i can find my lotions and so on and not wake Chris with the big light, but I digress, I was only able to watch One Piece, Blood Plus, Transformers and Deal or No Deal with Ellen on it. Now, I am in here after washing out my shorts and putting my compression hose back into the solution to soak because my darling daughter left them soaking wet on the sink....OK?
Anyway all this happened before eight thirty in the morning and that is insane.
I took a day off the hose because the top of my foot is too painful due to the wound i created in the night. Gonna take it easy today cause my PT therapist had me all over the place yesterday showing me how to use my new things for my shoulder which is making progress.
I need to write my landlord about this fucking ice patch parking lot and call my Doc to find out just whose screwing up my compression boots order because I'm getting the run a round.
Dig this, I get a letter from the government because the Social Security/Disability dept screwed up and put my social security number on a envelope they sent me and now are footing the bill for Afflack for a year so I'm covered if my identity is stolen for their screw up.
OK, I think I have nothing left to bitch about. I miss my Shrink.
Oh...one more thing.... On my MSN I have the number of our Soldiers who have died in Iraq as well as American Heroes after it and someone on my Msn list sent this...
"I don't support a war that's being prolonged as much as possible so the American banking associations can monopolize the countries oil supply and make a profit"I'm too pissed off at that comment to post a reply yet.
Bah! I also found my foot in pain and bloody this morning. Why? No, not itching with my nails but at some point in the night I rubbed it against the connector to my oxygen hose. So ow.
Back to griping about the heat...another thing that doesn't help is my oxygen concentrator puts out a lot of hot air as well.
Let's jump back to the soda soaked blanky. My Idea was to watch as many of my DVR shows then come in my room and find my flashlight I lost last night...yes, I have a flashlight by my bed so i can find my lotions and so on and not wake Chris with the big light, but I digress, I was only able to watch One Piece, Blood Plus, Transformers and Deal or No Deal with Ellen on it. Now, I am in here after washing out my shorts and putting my compression hose back into the solution to soak because my darling daughter left them soaking wet on the sink....OK?
Anyway all this happened before eight thirty in the morning and that is insane.
I took a day off the hose because the top of my foot is too painful due to the wound i created in the night. Gonna take it easy today cause my PT therapist had me all over the place yesterday showing me how to use my new things for my shoulder which is making progress.
I need to write my landlord about this fucking ice patch parking lot and call my Doc to find out just whose screwing up my compression boots order because I'm getting the run a round.
Dig this, I get a letter from the government because the Social Security/Disability dept screwed up and put my social security number on a envelope they sent me and now are footing the bill for Afflack for a year so I'm covered if my identity is stolen for their screw up.
OK, I think I have nothing left to bitch about. I miss my Shrink.
Oh...one more thing.... On my MSN I have the number of our Soldiers who have died in Iraq as well as American Heroes after it and someone on my Msn list sent this...
"I don't support a war that's being prolonged as much as possible so the American banking associations can monopolize the countries oil supply and make a profit"I'm too pissed off at that comment to post a reply yet.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Shrink...less
AAAGH! I need my SHRINK! Not that bad but really...yeah I do. The net isn't working, the kid has skipped out on chores again leaving Chris with a messy kitchen to cook dinner in and the chick who won all that Christmas stuff on the Ellen show was on TV today. I mean really now, I am going to HAVE to write Ellen to tell her how I feel. This family had a huge house full with wonderful things and she got all those goodies to boot because she wrote a letter??? I mean really, the rules said enter on the site to win and i did, every day and nothing, I who needs the items they were giving away like the bed, vacuum, and so on. Most of the items I had given away to my loved ones in my head so it wasn't like I was being greedy. I was just hoping Karma would swing things my way finally. Nope. Not for me. I love Ellen, I really do and I'm not slighting her in any way. I'm just frustrated at circumstance and how it seems the good to do for keeps getting more for the pockets while the struggle along keep fighting the good fight for a fist full of dollars....and that barely covers the bills.
I guess I was just believing in the Christmas miracle...
I guess I was just believing in the Christmas miracle...
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Angel Bear Has returned.
Wow, it has been a while since I have had the time or the gumption to write here. The holidays are gone but another milestone in my life is right around the corner. My baby is turning 18. It's true, it's true, it's damn true!
My holidays season was a great one. It was full of goodies and I went out of the house! Went to Chris' parents for Christmas and went to see AVPR. Awesome flick! So much fun to leave the house and not have to go to the Doc! Lucky and I spent Christmas day at home with her boyfriend Ben in tow. She and I cooked not one but two home cooked meals that day! We hadn't been together in the kitchen cooking for years, even if all I could do was sit and mix or chop things. We didn't argue and had a wonderful time. I loved it.
For New Years Lucky went to Ben's Dad's house then to his Mother's. She was gone a few days leaving Chris and I here to chock full the rest of his Christmas break with anime, movies and our personal hobbies. He was into his new video game and I was on the comp or in my room doing whatever. We had a blast and on Dec 30th., he asked me back out. Whoohoo! Now I have something to tell my shrink...haha.
My legs are getting better with the support hose. The wounds are gone and that is a blessing. I do have to dry patches on the top of each foot that are driving me insane at night cause they itch. If I can refrain from scratching in my sleep they will heal over but it is such a long drawn out process. I am going to call my leg Doc soon and ask him when I can start my walking in the halls again. I have been on bed rest for so long. It will feel good to get out and stretch my legs.
I still have a head, chest and sinus cold. I was put on antibiotics but they didn't really kick it. I have a pt appointment for my shoulder today. It's my first one so I know I will be hella sore when I get home. Tomorrow I see my Shrink then Friday I recoup from the past two days. LOL!
Lucky might be turning 18 but she still needs her Momma! Today, upon babysitting her "cousins" she called me leaving a frantic message on the voicemail, then called Liz and asked Randy to im me because she needed emotional support. She couldn't get Anna to stop crying. Poor thing! All is well now but if I tell you guys Lucky is over at babysitting, please do not call me. Until I can get roadrunner phone service I need to leave my line open. Anyway it all turned out ok and she earned some cash that she tried to turn down. What a sweet kid.
Back from physical therapy. I have sprained ligaments. He gave me three exercises to do at home 2 or 3 times a day and I need to see him back in 2 weeks. I hope then all is well.
I'm back in my guild a little bit every day but no one is around when I am it seems. I'm happy to be back even if all I can do is say hi in the ooc room.
Life is back to the norm pretty much. My day is my Sister and Pierce, My nights Chris and Lucky then some more Pierce and Sis if I have the time to get on before she goes to bed. Still having trouble sleeping. Chris is taking me to all my Doc appointments now. It leaves me pretty tired having to do every thing at the end of the day instead at the beginning where I can come home and recuperate. What can you do right? Just trudge on.
I think I have said enough. What else I might have rumbling around I will save for the Shrink...lol.
My holidays season was a great one. It was full of goodies and I went out of the house! Went to Chris' parents for Christmas and went to see AVPR. Awesome flick! So much fun to leave the house and not have to go to the Doc! Lucky and I spent Christmas day at home with her boyfriend Ben in tow. She and I cooked not one but two home cooked meals that day! We hadn't been together in the kitchen cooking for years, even if all I could do was sit and mix or chop things. We didn't argue and had a wonderful time. I loved it.
For New Years Lucky went to Ben's Dad's house then to his Mother's. She was gone a few days leaving Chris and I here to chock full the rest of his Christmas break with anime, movies and our personal hobbies. He was into his new video game and I was on the comp or in my room doing whatever. We had a blast and on Dec 30th., he asked me back out. Whoohoo! Now I have something to tell my shrink...haha.
My legs are getting better with the support hose. The wounds are gone and that is a blessing. I do have to dry patches on the top of each foot that are driving me insane at night cause they itch. If I can refrain from scratching in my sleep they will heal over but it is such a long drawn out process. I am going to call my leg Doc soon and ask him when I can start my walking in the halls again. I have been on bed rest for so long. It will feel good to get out and stretch my legs.
I still have a head, chest and sinus cold. I was put on antibiotics but they didn't really kick it. I have a pt appointment for my shoulder today. It's my first one so I know I will be hella sore when I get home. Tomorrow I see my Shrink then Friday I recoup from the past two days. LOL!
Lucky might be turning 18 but she still needs her Momma! Today, upon babysitting her "cousins" she called me leaving a frantic message on the voicemail, then called Liz and asked Randy to im me because she needed emotional support. She couldn't get Anna to stop crying. Poor thing! All is well now but if I tell you guys Lucky is over at babysitting, please do not call me. Until I can get roadrunner phone service I need to leave my line open. Anyway it all turned out ok and she earned some cash that she tried to turn down. What a sweet kid.
Back from physical therapy. I have sprained ligaments. He gave me three exercises to do at home 2 or 3 times a day and I need to see him back in 2 weeks. I hope then all is well.
I'm back in my guild a little bit every day but no one is around when I am it seems. I'm happy to be back even if all I can do is say hi in the ooc room.
Life is back to the norm pretty much. My day is my Sister and Pierce, My nights Chris and Lucky then some more Pierce and Sis if I have the time to get on before she goes to bed. Still having trouble sleeping. Chris is taking me to all my Doc appointments now. It leaves me pretty tired having to do every thing at the end of the day instead at the beginning where I can come home and recuperate. What can you do right? Just trudge on.
I think I have said enough. What else I might have rumbling around I will save for the Shrink...lol.
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